Archives for My Red China

21 Tips For Shenzhen China Bar Patrons

Posted on November 21, 2009 and filed under Tips, bars & nightlife.

Ok, so i’ve been to  few (dozen) bars and nightclubs here in Shenzhen. While bars aren’t as complex as say a rail station or something if you’re a new drinker in China, you’ll need some tips. Like information tips, not gratuity tips.

You don’t have to tip in China.

With that, let’s  go:


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5 comments.

How China Will Change You

Posted on November 19, 2009 and filed under Culture Shock, Moving To China, Tips.


I remember after my uncle came back from Vietnam he was never quite the same.

“That place changes you, man” he said to me, “Big time”.

When he came back to the US, where things were supposed to be better, sometimes they weren’t.

Sometimes they were just different. He had nightmares. He took to drinking heavily.

That he went to Vietnam in 1993, and travelled there as a sex tourist isn’t really relevant to the point i’m trying to make, instead living in Asia does change you, despite what I wrote before.

Now I don’t want to be the “this is what i’m learning in this foreign land” kind of asshole, but maybe this will be of use to you. Or me.

A few things you realize after living in China for a little bit:


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4 comments.

Dinner In China

Posted on November 19, 2009 and filed under Culture Shock, Food.

IMG_0239

Yep. It’s all-you-can-eat dog night again.

2 comments.

The Gwailo

Posted on November 16, 2009 and filed under Culture Shock.

The tools I need for my work are paper, tobacco, food, and a little whiskey. William Faulkner

I’ve been reading William Faulkner. In fact I read anything I can get my hands on here. Part of me wishes that I was out here writing a novel or script instead of internet businessing but that’s stupid because I can write a novel or a script if I want to and I don’t seem to do it.

I have an idea for a script called The Gwailo (or maybe The Wai Lao)– both terms mean white devil or ghost devil or whatever kind of nasty words they have for us crackers here in China.

Anyhow, here’s my pitch:


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4 comments.

Using An Elevator In China

Posted on November 15, 2009 and filed under Culture Shock, Tips.

You’re in China. You want to go to go upstairs or downstairs quickly without actually using stairs. What do you do?

If you said ‘take the elevator’ give yourself a pat on the back. You’re gonna go far.

Using an elevator in China is different than using one in other places.

Let’s begin.


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3 comments.

I Accidentally Ate Dog

Posted on November 15, 2009 and filed under Culture Shock, Food.

I went to dinner with my friend Felix and he had thought that I knew that Hot Pot at this certain place meant dog. I didn’t know. During a later indignant speech about how eating dogs is wrong Felix told me that I had in fact eaten dog already. Later Felix pointed it out on a menu, so that I would know what it looks like.

Here ya go:

IMG_0179

No comments.

American Movies

Posted on November 12, 2009 and filed under Culture Shock.

I watch a lot of American movies here in China. I’m not a movie-watching kind of person back home.

But now:

I like them. They understand me. I understand them.

(Also, DVDs are 60 cents with slim packaging and $1 with professional packaging)

1 comment.

25 Things About China

Posted on November 12, 2009 and filed under Tips.

You can find a lot to dislike about pretty much anything and China is no exception. Here are some things about China (Shenzhen in particular):

  1. I have not had any amazing cultural-spiritual awakening or enlightenment and probably won’t. I haven’t stood on any mountain tops and looked across the countryside or shared an intimate meal with a traditional chinese girl.
  2. Mandarin is really difficult to learn and absorb. Unlike TV shows where in a stressful situation you can suddenly speak fluently after being immersed, i’m more confused after being immersed and in stressful situations. Sometimes when I can’t understand what someone is saying they grab a pencil and write the chinese characters. Ah, that’s helpful.
  3. Like you look at those videos with the nerdy bespectacled black guy with the 14 inch cock plowing trashy looking Floridian broads, Chinese people look at me with curiousity, confusion and disgust.
  4. Chinese people drink hot water with meals. Sometimes tea but always that hot water.
  5. They do eat dogs, snakes, turtles, cats, etc. You will see these things in cages and tanks in front of restaurants. Can you imagine being a chef and having to kill an innocent cat for somebody else to eat? (I hear cats taste like an ocean of flavors in your mouth
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6 comments.

Breakfast Roulette #2: Won Ton Soup

Posted on November 3, 2009 and filed under Culture Shock, Food.

From your album:
“Wall Photos”

Breakfast Roulette#2: every morning I will eat breakfast at one of two restaurants that have breakfast menus, but in chinese. I point to one of the 10 items every day and must eat it. Yesterday was thin bread with steak and hollandaise. Win! Today I lost pretty bad. 18 more to go.

2 comments.

What’s It Like Living & Working In Shenzhen?

Posted on November 1, 2009 and filed under Moving To China, Tips, bars & nightlife.

A reader recently sent me an email:

Hey Andy-

I’m a fan of Misanthropy Today and was curious what it’s like living and working in China. Is it a lot different?  I’ve been considering working abroad for awhile.

Take Care!
Brian

Hey Brian-

Well i’ve already written a little about the subject but if you want just a 50 feet up view, here goes:

Have you ever vacationed in Mexico? If so, you know that you spend most of your time walking, shopping, eating and then going to loud discotheques at night time. You walk, shop, eat and drink way too much. By the end of your trip your body needs another vacation.

Living and working in China is pretty much like that except imagine having to go to work every morning during your vacation in Mexico. Yeah, you’re in a strange land experiencing new things and flavors but you’re still required to wake up at a decent hour and do the same job you do in the US.

Pretty much the whole thing in a nutshell.

Andy


“Forget about work, drink one of these. “

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